The Best Way to Ask Your Spouse for a Divorce

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Divorce Do's and Dont's

Find out what you should and shouldn't do during the divorce process.

That’s it – you can’t do it anymore.  You’re done.  You have tried your hardest for years, but you just can’t seem to make it work.  You want out of your marriage, but do not know how to bring up the topic of divorce to your spouse without devastating them or triggering a war.  The Huffington Post article, “The Best Way to Ask Your Spouse for a Divorce”, explores different steps in approaching the situation.

Be prepared.  Understanding ahead of time where your spouse is emotionally can make a big difference in how you approach the topic of divorce.  Knowing how aware your spouse is to the state of your marriage can help you be prepared for both how to bring up the subject and how your spouse will likely react to the news.

Choose an appropriate time and place.  Of course, there is no great time to announce that you want out of your marriage, but there are certain scenarios that are better than others.  The conversation should never occur in front of your children, or coincide with another major event in your lives if at all possible.  It should take place somewhere that you can have a calm discussion and make sure that there is plenty of time for you both to talk.

Be gentle, but firm.  Try to keep in mind that although you have spent a lot of time thinking about this decision and preparing for divorce, chances are that your spouse has probably not, so be understanding and allow time for the news to sink in.

Be ready for your spouse’s reaction.  If asking for a divorce is going to come as a complete shock to your spouse, be prepared for retaliation as a response.

Avoid discussing the details.  Negotiating a settlement without the appropriate guidance from a professional could end up coming back to bite you.  Try not to discuss too many details on your own.  It’s better to wait until you have hired the right professional to guide you through the process.

When it comes to how to ask your spouse for a divorce, there is no simple answer.  However, when the above steps are taken into consideration, there is a much better chance of making the divorce process as peaceful as possible for you, your spouse and your children.

Are you considering filing for divorce or separation?  When a couple decides to dissolve their marriage, there are many aspects that need to be addressed including child custody and financial support, parenting time/visitation, spousal support and equitable distribution, to name a few.  These are subjects that Jay D. Raxenberg, P.C. has gained a great deal of experience in over the last two decades in Supreme and Family Court in the tri-state area.  Mr. Raxenberg has extensive training, knowledge and experience in this area of the law and is dedicated to providing exceptional compassionate legal representation to all of his clients.  Please call (516) 491-0565 or toll free at (888) 543-4867 to arrange your initial complimentary consultation.